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The Easter Bunny, Santa Claus, The Tooth Fairy: Childhood magic that our kids enjoy and cherish, or lies are we telling them that will damage their trust in us?

3/23/2022

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​This is a topic I have been thinking about a lot lately and with Easter coming up in a few short weeks I wanted to put it out there for discussion and see what other parent's opinions are on the topic.
 
Here are my thoughts: On one hand - I have vowed not to lie to my child. I want her to trust me and believe in me, I want her to believe that I am someone she can always trust no matter what and that I have her best interest at heart in all matters. On the other hand... I spent years letting her believe in Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny, the Switch Witch at Halloween... as a matter of fact, I did MORE than just let her believe, I’m the one who taught her about these magical, yet mythical, beings to begin with. And year after year I put on quite a show to keep her believing.
 
I believed that it was all fun, childhood magic that every child should get to experience. I mean, I did as a child and everyone else I know did, too. Somehow I thought that it was super important and necessary even to get her to believe, that she would be missing out on something if I didn’t teach her about these mythical creatures.
 
But then last year my daughter started asking questions about the Switch Witch ((the stuffed witch she leaves her Halloween candy out for every year and who replaces it with healthier options and/or toys.)) At first she would ask questions like, “is the switch with real?” and “how does she fly if she is just a doll?” But then she asked point blank: “Are you the switch witch? Are you the one taking my candy?”
 
It was one thing when I was introducing fun, imaginative ideas for her to take part in, but it was a whole other thing to lie right to her face when she asked a direct question. In the spirit of not lying to her I answered her honestly. “Yes, I am the switch witch.” She was disappointed, and I thought I detected a few small tears in her eyes as well. We talked about it a bit, and I was as honest as I could be, explaining that I told her there was a switch witch because I wanted to give her something fun to believe and take part in for Halloween. I asked how she felt and she said a little bit sad. We also talked about not telling her younger cousin any of this so that he could keep believing for a little bit longer. ((So am I encouraging her to lie now, too?))
 
She was silent for a minute and I could see the wheels turning in her head. Then, with wide eyes, she asked more questions: “If you’re the switch witch are you the Easter Bunny, too? Those white paw prints on the driveway, did you do those? Are you Santa Claus?”
 
I definitely wasn’t prepared for this and I panicked. But again, in the spirit of not lying I was honest (sort of) and admitted that yes, I was the easter bunny, too. But I wasn’t ready to let go of Christmas yet. I had all these thoughts running through my head .. thoughts that had been fed to me by society … she is too young to stop believing in Santa … if I tell her the truth now she will be so sad … I can’t crush her dreams … she is supposed to believe in santa for a little bit longer… So I told her that I still believe in Santa and I hoped she would too.
 
Years ago I read an article about what to say when your kids find out Santa isn’t real. It explained that anyone who is old enough to understand the spirit of giving is a Santa. Anyone who gives from the heart is a Santa. So when children get to an age where they stop believing, instead of telling them Santa is made up, pretend, to teach them that now they can see the magic of Christmas in a different way and they, too, can become a Santa now.
 
I fell in love with that idea. It matches my beliefs about generosity and also felt like such a softer way to let children know the truth then just saying Santa doesn’t really exist.
 
When my daughter asked direct questions like “Are you putting the presents under the tree?” I would keep saying the same thing: “I believe in Santa and the magic of Christmas.” Somehow I felt like if I kept saying this, then I wasn’t really lying to her. She seemed to except this and we made it through another Christmas of her happily believing in Santa. But this time, I felt super guilty. I now felt like I was, indeed, lying to the person I swore never to lie to.
 
One week ago my daughter lost her 6th tooth and asked right away if I was the tooth fairy. When I admitted that yes I was, she told me I had lied to her all this time. She pointed out how I pretended the tooth fairy was real, put money under her pillow and even wrote notes that supposedly came from the tooth fairy. She has so many questions including how I came up with his name (Toby Tooth Fairy,) why I wrote notes and pretended to be him, where the teeth went …
 
Her eyes welled up and she said she couldn’t believe I lied to her. It was heart breaking.
 
I explained it all the best way I could: I didn’t pretend about the Easter Bunny and Santa and the Tooth Fairy to hurt her, or lie to her, or trick her. I was trying to create something fun for her. Something magical to believe in while she was a child.

​I tried my best to convey my intentions, but she kept coming back to my actions: I lied to her.
 
We have only one magical holiday tradition left – Santa Claus. And while Christmas is still more than ½ a year away, it’s heavy on my mind. I’m torn between giving her one last year to believe (she is only 7 after all!) and telling her the truth now, before she asks me again.
 
I’ve read lots of articles online about this subject in an attempt to figure out the answer. But for all the articles I find where professionals say its fine to let them believe, there are just as many saying that it is damaging. I guess there just isn’t one answer, no definitive right or wrong.
 
Of all the articles I read the one that stuck out to me the most wasn’t because what the author had to say, but because of what one of the readers said in the comments. She said that children have such wild imaginations on their own, so why would think we had to make up lies for them to believe? That has really stuck with me and I’m now rethinking all of the years I have spent lying to my daughter about these holidays. Did she really need it? And what did it get us in the long run other than damaged trust?
 
So I guess the question is: Santa Claus, The Easter Bunny, The Tooth Fairy… is it all innocent fun we give our children and really no big deal, or is it harmful lies we are spreading that cause them to lose trust in us?
 
What is your take on this? Weigh in over on the Peace Play FB Page
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Gratitude Window

6/21/2020

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​Gratitude is a powerful practice. Spiritual teacher Eckhart Tolle says that gratitude is the foundation of all abundance. Whatever it is we are hoping to attract an abundance of into our lives, whether it be wealth, love, health or anything else, will always have to begin with gratitude for what you have. I LOVE the positive impact my gratitude practice has had on my life and because of that I'm always trying to come up with new ways to practice gratitude with my family at home.

As an Easter gift my daughter received a set of really cool window markers and today we decided to create a GRATITUDE WINDOW.
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We used each box on our large living room window to draw a picture of something we are grateful for. Our pictures included flowers, rain, the sun, family and our home.
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Not only was it a fun activity, but until we decide to clean the windows we get a constant reminder of the blessings in our life, displayed across the window in the main room of our home. Give it a try at your home! If you don't have window markers, dry erase markers will work on your windows, too. (Test a small spot first!!)  You can do this on windows, mirrors or any other glass surface. Do it in a place where you will see it each day and be reminded of the wonderful blessings you have in your life. Happy Gratitude praciticing!
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Power Posture & Self Study for Kids

5/23/2020

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Warrior II, or Virabhadrasana II as it is known in Sanskrit,  is a power pose for children. Hang out here for a moment or two yourself and notice how strong and powerful you feel. You don't have to be in this posture long to feel how it helps to strengthens your legs, core, shoulders and arms, as well as helps to open the hips. If you want to help your kids feel strong, increase confidence and improve focus, introduce Warrior II into your day. You can start by having them come into the pose for a bit and gaze out over their hand … then focus on one finger … then one finger nail .. and finally just the very tip of that finger. This pose is a workout for the body AND the mind.

​While it IS a physically powerful pose, that's not the only thing to focus on here with kids. This pose offers a great opportunity for kids to look inward, and discover what makes them a powerful person on the inside. Ask them, what makes you a powerful person? What type of special power do you have? If they need a little help figuring this one out, you could suggest, is it your courage? your kindness? your determination?

Svādhyāya is a sanskrit word that means self study. With poses like Warrior II we give our kids the opportunity to learn and discover more about themselves, their inner being and their strengths. Give this one a try at home with your kids any time they need a movement break or some increased focus.

Here are some tips for making Warrior II fun for your little yogis:
1) Place bean bags or small, light  stuffed animals on their hands and head and ask them to balance them while in this pose.
2) Challenge them to a Warrior II stand off! See who can stay in this pose the longest.
3) Turn it into a dance party! How many dance moves can you do in your warrior pose?
4) JUMP SWITCH! Can you jump from warrior II on the right side to warrior II on the left side?
5) Pretend your yoga mat is a surf board and your out in the middle of the ocean. Do a little warrior surfing, and don't forget to jump over any sharks you see coming your way!

Have your children join me for my new online yoga series where we will practice poses, breathwork, meditation and so much more! First class begins Monday May 25th. I'll entertain your kids for a while, you just relax 😊
Learn More
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Breathwork + Intention Setting = SUCCESS

5/7/2020

 
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As the days in quarantine drag on, it can be easy to lose motivation to do...well just about anything. You can start to feel like everything is the same, day in and day out, like we have lost control, lost direction, lost purpose. Anyone else?

There is a way to take back that direction and purpose. That way is intention setting.

An intention is a word or a statement that describes how you want to show up in the world and what you would like to attract into your experience. It is a purpose. Setting your intention is the first step towards embodying how you want to feel. 

If you wake up in the morning and think to yourself, today I will be full of patience, or this morning I'm going to find more peace with my kids, then you are setting an intention. The difference between an intention and a goal is that a goal is future oriented and focused on an outcome and an intention is all about the present moment and focused on a feeling, a state of being. 

Intentions can be as simple as 1-2-3.
1) Set your intention upon waking up
2) Complete this sentence: Today I intend to ___________ (see the good in everyone, focus on the positive, take care of myself, etc.)
3) Remind yourself of your intention throughout the day

Your kids are definitely not too young to start beginning this beautiful practice, especially if you teach it in a fun and playful way. Here's how you can combine the power of the breath with the power of intention setting for children (and for You ,too!)

This is best done as a morning activity, but don't sweat it if you forget! Do it whenever you can remember it. Give your kids a sheet of paper and some crayons and have them trace their hands in super slow motion, taking a deep breath in when they trace up, and a deep breath out when they trace down. So every trace of a finger completes a full inhale and a full exhale. By doing simple, yet effective breathwork before the intention setting, we are giving them a chance to slow the breath and the heart rate, to calm the nervous system and to get clear and focused. After they finish tracing their hand, ask them to think of 5 things they would like to experience today, and each thing gets written on a finger. Allow them the freedom to choose and try not to discourage their answers, no matter how different they are from your expectations! (your kid might very well say they want to experience more tv or ice cream for breakfast) The key here is that we are introducing a powerful practice in a simple and non-forceful way, so don't worry if their intention isn't quite in line with what you are thinking. If your kids prefer to chose just one intention for the day, they can write it right in the center of the palm instead of on each finger.

After they fill out what they would like to experience, they can decorate their hand any way they wish, and then hang it somewhere they will see it throughout the day as a reminder of what they are attracting. You can have them do this daily or weekly, and to be a little more eco friendly, you could use a chalk board or wipe off board so it can be cleaned off and reused each day.

Take power of your days. Teach your children that they have the ability to do the same. 
Enjoy and have fun! 😉


Kids love coloring! Check out my coloring affirmations activity here!

Coloring Affirmations

5/4/2020

 
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This is the newest activity in our home, and it has been a huge success in so many ways. 

Affirmations are short, positive statements that describe a goal in its completed state. So for example, if you are experiencing a lot of stress and anxiety and you would like to use an affirmation to help feel more at peace, your affirmation could be I FEEL AT PEACE.  By wording your affirmation in a way that describes your goal as already being completed (saying I FEEL at peace instead of I wish I were at peace) you are working on reframing your beliefs (the belief that you are not at peace already) as well as putting out the energy that will attract more peace to you.  Affirmations can be used to help create the reality that you want. Have you ever heard the quote, where your thoughts go, energy flows?  By creating and repeating affirmations, you are giving energy to positive thoughts so they grow into your beliefs, your words, your actions and your reality. 
Affirmations aren't just for us adults. Kids can use affirmations, too. And why not introduce them to affirmations while they are young so that they can learn the power of positive thinking and positive energy early?

Years ago I was introduced to a book called Praying In Color, an alternative to traditional prayer. It involves expressing your prayer through coloring. I recently began doing this with my affirmations as a way to deepen my experience and feel more connected to the affirmation. When my 5-year old daughter noticed that some pages in my journal were written on and some were colored, she and about it and that's how I began teaching her about coloring affirmations.

Coloring affirmations is a fun activity for both kids and adults. You write your affirmations in the center, and use crayons, markers or colored pencils to decorate all around them. There is no right or wrong way to do this, just let your creativity flow! I usually write my affirmation inside of a circle and then draw and color designs around it, almost like a mandala. You can also write out several affirmations and connect them with your drawings. Writing out the affirmation and coloring around it allows us to stay focused on the affirmation for a longer period of time because we are actively engaged in creating and decorating it. For kids who aren't writing yet, you can write an affirmation for them or they can draw pictures of their affirmations. When I taught my daughter how to do this, she began creating her own affirmations and asking me to write them for her. She has come up with some beautiful ones: You get what you believe in, stay yourself, be happy, be healthy. While I like to say my affirmation silently to myself several times while I am coloring around it, I don't give her any other instruction about what to do, I enjoy seeing how she makes this her own project and does it in her own way. I gave her her own affirmation notebook which makes it even more special for her.

So, why should kids color affirmations instead of just saying them?
1. Sometimes sitting still or quietly focusing on an affirmation is a challenge for kids
2. This is a visual, concrete way for them to create affirmations
3. They can express their affirmation with creativity
4. Coloring is a fun, relaxing & meditative experience
5. The physical action allows them to stay focused on the affirmation longer

Here are some examples of affirmations you can teach to your kids to get started.
* I am happy to be ME
* I am an amazing person
* I choose happiness
* Today is going to be a great day 
* I believe in my goals and my dreams

When you first begin using affirmations, it might be hard to remember them or make them a regular part of our day. That's one of the reasons I am loving coloring affirmations with my daughter - we recently began making coloring a regular part of our day so remembering our affirmations has become a lot easier. Give this a try at home with your kids! Start creating and sharing positive affirmations together. Happy coloring :)
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Calm Your Child in 3 steps

4/26/2020

 
Stuck at home with nowhere to go. No outings, no playdates. Add to that parents who are suddenly thrust into the role of school teacher while trying to figure out how to work from home. Our current situation is one that can easily lead to rambunctious, wild children with lots of pent up energy and a bad case of cabin fever that leave parents looking for ways to help calm those kiddos down! Here are my 3 tips for calming your child when they are bouncing off the walls!
 
1. Calm yourself down first. You may not like me for this one because if you’re looking for a quick fix then you will probably find this an annoying suggestion, but it’s such an important one. Our kids pick up on our vibes and often mimic them as well. Have you ever noticed that if you’re having a really rough day where you’re mad and cranky, your child tends to display the same behavior? If we want to SEE calm we need to BE calm. So check your own energy first before trying to calm down a rowdy child. If you’re getting all worked up because they are, then your feeding the cycle. Remove yourself, have a sip of your water or coffee, take a few deep breaths, remember that they need you to be calm for them, and then step back in. Check out this awesome book, Breathe Mama Breathe by Shonda Morali. It's one of my faves because of the way the author introduces simple, easy mindfulness and meditation practices even the busiest mom can do.

2. Let them move. Movement needs to come before any attempt to calm a wild child. If your child is like a bull in a china shop, you can try out all the calming activities in the world, but until all that energy is out of their body it will be a losing battle. Get them up and moving, even if only for a few minutes, because getting out the energy is a key step in helping your child calm down. Play a few rounds of tag. Do some jumping jacks. Go for a walk. Jump on the bed! Find something to climb. Movement first, calming exercises next.

3. Stimulate the parasympathetic nervous system.  The opposite of our sympathetic nervous system, the parasympathetic nervous system is our rest and digest system. When we stimulate this system breathing slows down, our heart relaxes and beats slower and digestion begins. This is our state of calm and relaxation. So how do we switch off sympathetic and turn on parasympathetic in our child? Listen to a guided relaxation or meditation tracks (check out my free meditations here!). Do some deep breathing exercises together (check out my breathing breaks on the free resource page). Come into a physical posture such as legs up the wall or child’s pose to signal safety and tell the body it’s time to rest. Try out my all-time favorite meditation technique! 

Check out my new online course for parents to learn more yoga activities you can teach your children at home to help bring a little more calm, peace & relaxation!

My Favorite Meditation Activity for Kids

4/24/2020

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Yes, your child can meditate. No, they are not too young. 
Alright! Glad we have got that settled!

How, you may wonder, can a young child meditate? Well, lets talk a little about what meditation actually is. Meditation is bringing all of your attention to WHAT you want, for the amount of TIME that you want. It is being in the present moment and focusing all of your attention on a subject of your choosing. It could be focusing on your breath. It could be repeating a mantra. Regardless of the subject, you are focusing on one thing, and redirecting your attention back to that thing when your mind wanders. You keep coming back to this moment.
Children are masters of being in the present moment. Watch your little youngsters at play when they are building with blocks, or creating with clay. They are so involved with their activity, the activity that they have chosen, that they don't even hear you calling their name. And yes, at times we may feel like they are ignoring us or not listening … but could it be they are involved instead in a meditative experience?
Children are great at meditating because it is so much a part of their nature to become fully absorbed in what they are doing. In time, as they grow older, our fast pace and busy lives teach them to do more and pay attention to more, and as a result they become more easily distracted and less in the present moment. THIS is why we practice meditation with children. Not because they need to learn it, but because we don't want them to lose it. We can foster that natural ability they have to stay present, to focus, to be 100% involved in the subject of their choosing.
So what is my favorite meditation activity for children?
​Coloring 😃
Have you ever watched your child while they color? They get lost in it. The colors, the designs, the creation. Its a beautiful experience for them where they are pouring all of their attention into what they want, for the time that they want. Meditation. The experience is calming, relaxing and helps to increase focus and decrease stress. 

At the end of my children's yoga classes we often color mandalas. I put on some relaxing, instrumental music and the kids color in peace. Mandalas are designs inside of a circle that are used to increase focus and aid in meditation. If you do a google search for kids mandalas, you will find an endless number of free downloads to print. Give it a try this weekend! Put on some chill music, diffuse some relaxing oils and have a coloring session with your kids. Watch them while they color, notice how involved they get in the process and how focused their little minds become. Its beautiful to watch these mini meditators in action. 
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To learn more meditations that you can teach and practice with your kids at home, check out my new online course for parents, Yoga Tools To Teach Your Children
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Wake up, Energize and Focus for Schoolwork!

4/24/2020

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Do you have kids who jump out of bed in the morning, wide eyed and full of energy, ready to begin a new day with pep in their step and a smile on their face? Or is your child a little more difficult to get out of bed in the morning, sometimes refusing to open their eyes? If your not a morning person, then perhaps a child who isn't eager to jumpstart a new day is working for you! But … what about when there is a schedule to keep, a routine to follow and homeschool/distance learning to be done? How do we rouse our sleeping beauties, give them the boost they need to get moving and the focus they need to start their schoolwork? Here are 3 fun and easy ways to help those sleepy heads wake up and get the day started on the right foot.
  1. Morning gratitude– Talking about what your grateful for while your children are in bed and still a bit fuzzy as they come out of sleep is a wonderful way to begin the day with some positivity. An attitude of gratitude will go a long way! Snuggle up with your little ones, get cozy and start telling them all of the things your grateful for about this brand new day. I’m grateful to see your beautiful eyes opening. I’m grateful the sun is out today and we will get to play outside. I’m grateful its pancake day! Whatever you feel, whatever you can think of that puts a smile on your face, share it with your child. After you’ve shared a boat load of your own gratitude, invite your child to share what they are grateful for this morning. Maybe they will want to participate and maybe they won’t. Don’t push it or try to force them to share with you, just continue with this activity for a few mornings and see if they warm up to the idea. 😉 Even if they don’t choose to share they still get to wake up hearing about your gratitude which is a positive way to begin the day.
  2. Sun Dance– Wake up with a child friendly version of sun salutations. The sun dance is a series of yoga poses that are linked together with the breath to make a beautiful flow. The sun does so much for us – it gives us light, heat and makes things grow – and in turn we can salute and honor the sun with this beautiful dance that will wake up the body, warm up the muscles, get the blood pumping and energize the body! (video below)
  3. Alternate nostril breath – this is a great breath for children to practice before their lessons. In alternate nostril breathing, children practice breathing through just one nostril at a time. This breath slows the heart rate, relaxes the mind and the body, increases focus and attention and is calming, yet energizing. Because alternate nostril breathing also helps to relieve stress and anxiety, it can be used as a good breathing break if schoolwork is causing any angst. (video below)

Sun Dance

Alternate Nostril Breathing

These three activities will help your kiddos wake up, energize and get focused for their school lessons. Enjoy, and have a great day!

To learn more yoga activities you can teach your children at home, check out my online course, Yoga Tools To Teach Your Children.​ *BONUS - For a limited time I’m offering access to my 4 class kids yoga series with purchase of this course.
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Every day activities to do at home with your kids

3/23/2020

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For a while, staying home and hanging out with our immediate family only is our new norm. It isn't always easy, and we may have a lot to rearrange and figure out. Each day I am posting activities over on the Peace Play Facebook Page that you can do at home with your family to begin or continue your family yoga practice. Head on over and follow Peace Play so you can practice along with me! And don't worry if you miss a day or two, I will be listing them all out here in this post so you can catch up :)

Day 1 Insect Breathing Video (Video on Free resources page)
Day 2 How to make a relaxation jar at home (Video on Free resources page)
Day 3 Grounding rock activity
Day 4 Nursery rhyme & yoga video (Video on Free resources page)
Day 5 Guided family meditation (Audio on Family Meditation page)
​Day 6 Create new growth
​Day 7 Using Affirmations at Home
Day 8 Start a gratitude practice with your family
Day 9 Dance for the sun with this child friendly sun salutation
Day 10 Make a breathing basket at home (Video on Free resources page)
Day 11 Dance Party!
Day 12 Spread love with chalk messages
Day 13 Go on a family heart hunt
Day 14 Yoga poses for Spring from Kids Yoga Stories
Day 15 Learn about bees!
Day 16 Observe wild animals at Explore.org
Day 17 Guided meditation for preteens & teenagers (Audio on Family Meditation page)
Day 18 Family breathing break
Day 19 Celebrate Spring with my calendar from April 2019
Day 20 Family yoga time with Karma Kids!
Day 21 Release Control
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Day 22 Have a laugh!
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Day 23 Spend time with trees today
Day 24 Make a nature mobile

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Starting a Gratitude Practice

3/23/2020

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Today is a perfect day to begin a 🙏 gratitude practice 🙏 with your children. I'm sure we could all create a mile long list with all the things that are lost and we are missing right now ... but what about all the things that we have?
An attitude of gratitude is what helps attract more into our lives that we can be grateful for. Here are a few suggestions on how to begin a gratitude practice at home TODAY
❤️ Light a gratitude candle 🕯 each morning at breakfast, during dinner or as part of the bedtime routine and have every family member say something (or a few things!) they are grateful for.
🧡 Have everyone in the family write (or draw, for the little ones!) something they are grateful for on a slip of paper 📝 and place it in a jar. Do this every day and at the end of the week sit as a family and read through them all together.
💚 Pick a wall in the house 🏠 to create a gratitude tree. 🌳 Cut the trunk and branches out of brown construction paper and tape to the wall. Every day each family member draws or writes what they are grateful for that day on a cut out leaf 🍃 or flower 🌸 that you tape to the branches.

Yes, there is a lot of confusion, sadness, fear, and loss right now. But there is also a lot to be grateful for. Here are the things I am grateful for in this moment:

🔅Spring
🔅Extra time spent with my family in nature
🔅A more relaxed morning instead of a rushed routine
🔅More freedom during the day to do what we want
🔅Lots of time for baking! 🍰 🧁 🍪 🧑‍🍳
🔅Good books 📚 📖 🤓
🔅Gardening

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    Pamela Nixon
    ​
    Mother, Yoga teacher, creator of Peace Play.

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